Well today, the first of May 2008, is mine and Leslie’s anniversary and as such I shall likely be unavailable through most of today. You know … Dinner etc.
My copy of Grand Theft Auto arrived yesterday and what I have sampled so far is pretty damn fun and probably my favourite new features include:
- Having a mobile phone that I have given a REALLY irritating ring tone
- Good Taxi services for once
- Decent mini-games
- The interwebs
I’ve played a few hours and completed one or two character lines and not a whole lot has really changed. Although notably - and you’re probably sick of me saying this - the plot thus far draws a lot of parallels with Scarface but with Russians. And in NYC.
One of the better ideas was this mobile phone they give you, which you can use to stay in touch with slags and mission givers and even receive text messages. Even better is the idea that once a mission giver likes you, you can then phone up and ask for favours!
And a little bit of a spoiler: Completing the missions for the guy who runs a taxi-firm allows you to call in a free cab ride once a day.
Ah, Taxis. I remember being gouged a lot in previous GTA titles but my God I actually like these taxis! They only cost a lot if you insist on instant travel (I’ve seen the price QUADRUPLE) but generally a few minutes accross an island in a taxi is worth about $10. Awesome. For now, while the cars around me are total shite, I tend to get Taxi’s for reasonably long journeys. Oh and did I mention you HAIL them? Stand at the roads edge and hit LB and it’ll pull over. Sometimes with hillarious consequences.
The Mini games i’ve tried out so far are bowling, 8-ball and Darts. Darts I fucking rock at and each I believe has an associate achievement. 8-ball for winning a game, darts for getting a 180 and bowling I failed to get. It’s either going to be “Get a strike” or “Win a perfect game!”. If it’s the latter it can go fuck off and die. Suddenly going on dates and getting teh gurlz isn’t an adventure in tedium and time wasting. And if you’re really strapped for friends, call your goon of a cousin, nobody likes him either and he’s always free!
Lastly, the interwebs I sampled for five minutes was very 2D but I imagine there’s a lot of potential i’ve yet to see. For one my crappy phone can’t use the MP3 ringtones or anything yet … So i’ll have to come back for them. But I did use a dating website and look forward to checking my emails in future for teh hot luvs. My only problem so far is that the “Shopping” area doesn’t seem to actually fucking sell you anything. Yet at least.
A few things that frustrate me:
- How useless some of the cars are.
- The way the 360 handles playing your own music
- Most of the radio stations SUCK.
- All those static channels on the TV.
- The fact that the police system is C&P out of Scarface.
And now a reward for my readers:
Strapped for weapons? Too cheap to buy them? Here’s a tip for you!
Get yourself a basic firearm, mug a policeman or something. Then go to your local hospital (One of the big ones you can go in) and crouch behind a row of seats. They make innordinately good cover. Kill everyone.
Then when the police arrive open fire on them to. If you need some health, don’t worry! Theres a whole bunch of vending machines 2-feet away!
The best part … You can max out your shotgun, pistol and SMG ammo … Then just let the police kill you and forfeit a small sum. Alternatively if you die prematurely … It doesn’t matter because you can just walk in and do it again.
Just - Whatever you do - Don’t get arrested. Happy Hunting!
Regards,
JamesR.
Don’t worry, the irony of using cabs all the time in a game called GRAND THEFT AUTO isn’t lost on me 
